We know that No Time to Die will be Daniel Craig’s final turn as everyone’s favorite alcoholic misogynist spy James Bond. Studios have been scrambling to find the next candidate. Men like Tom Hardy and Idris Elba have been in talks (with Elba ruled out as too old), but people are completely overlooking whom I think truly deserves the role once he’s finished: Daniel Craig’s forehead.
Daniel Craig’s Forehead Has Experience with the Role
There are numerous reasons for choosing Daniel Craig’s forehead to be Britain’s #1 double-0 agent. For one, it understands what it’s like for an actor playing Bond, being attached to Daniel Craig on a permanent basis and all. It’s like how Joe Biden will make the best president because he was the Vice President throughout Obama’s two-term presidency, except the forehead is literally always there with Craig. You can’t go wrong here. Craig can coach it through every line, every action, ensuring it turns in a good performance.
It’s Already Proven to Be a Capable Subtle Actor
Another reason to choose Daniel Craig’s forehead is it shows character, and we’ve seen it many times. Even given no speaking lines in any of Craig’s previous films, I’ve always seen it as the true star of each of them.
When Bond was being tortured in Casino Royale at the hands of Mads Mikkelsen’s villain, my eyes saw the torment expressed perfectly in his glistening, tense forehead. I felt its pain more than I did Bond’s.
When Bond was seducing Camille Montes in Quantum of Solace I could tell it was that suave, weathered forehead that was responsible for getting her into bed.
And when he was kicking Javier Bardem’s ass in Skyfall, it was the forehead that did all the heavy lifting, looking so cold and calculating in the process. Much more so than Craig’s steel-blue eyes, which can be a little hammy on screen at times.
I think with speaking lines and a chance to stand out from Daniel Craig, this forehead just might be the talk of Tinseltown. It has incredible presence as it is. I’m just not sure what its voice would sound like, but I can imagine something with an infinite amount of gravity and masculinity oozing from its pores if given the opportunity. It’s already an excellent silent actor, and there’s no telling what we might be able to see if it’s treated with the dignity it deserves.
While being an action star without limbs might prove a challenge, they may be able to make it the first amputee Bond as well, giving the character the ability to triumph over disability.
I’ve even sent a tweet to the James Bond Twitter account to see if there’s any possibility of a forehead-centric Bond:
Until we hear back, it looks like Daniel Craig’s forehead is likely to be ignored unjustly, retreating to the shadows after the man below it steps down from the Bond throne. It’s a damn shame, but perhaps someday foreheads will get their rightful shot at acting. Maybe Daniel Craig’s can even pioneer those days. Until then, my friend. Until then.